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IM to Shaun (minus Shaun)...
This was another interesting moment. I have them occasionally. A little background is necessary on this one. First of all, Shaun and I were supposed to go to Ace Hardware (the "good" Ace; over on the east side) because he needed more pink spray paint. Yes, you read that right. Pink spray paint. Krylon. No he is not gay. He is secure enough in his masculinity to have flourescent pink on a computer, and not be offended. The plan was to go to Ace, so I tried IMing him to make plans to accomplish such a feat. However, he was leaving his AIM unattended apparently. Now, we will often send random messages to each other when such a thing happens. However, I inadvertently took this to a new level in the following AIM seesion. Keep in mind that this is a one sided IM (well at least initially...Shaun does eventually participate), and I was intending a response during most of it, so it was spaced out over time. According to it's timestamps, this begun at 3:40PM and ended at 5:06PM. Also, there are many "geek" computer references and "Leet" speak as well. There are references to M.A.M.E., which if you don't know, is an arcade game emulator for PC that Shaun is a bit addicted to. If there are references tha you are unsure of, you can always email me for clarification.
Without further ado, here is the actual transcript of the IM, including the ending where Shaun particpates and comments on said content. The screen names have been changed to protect the guilty. Enjoy =^)
Jake: wanker
Jake: so is Ace the place?
Jake: TARDCART!!!!
Jake: Get off the M.A.M.E. and respond you punk
Jake: No M.A.M.E. for you
Jake: wanker
Jake: wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker
Jake: wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker wanker
Jake: punk
Jake: and I can't even call you
Jake: some wankers, I swear
Jake: PINK PAINT!!!!!
Jake: It's calling you
Jake: you know you want it
Jake: If you could, you'd bathe in it
Jake: but you can't
Jake: because it would not be feasible
Jake: and feasibility is important
Jake: except for when it
Jake: s not
Jake: Good Ace = Pink Paint
Jake: Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint Pink Paint
Jake: Athlon?
Jake: OVERCLOCKED!!!!!
Jake: p|-|33R my l337 0\/3RC10c|‹i|\|9 s|‹i11z!!!
Jake: POOP!!!
Jake: FREE COMPUTER PARTS!!!!!!!!
Jake: DEAD MODEMS!!!!!!!!!
Jake: LINUX R00LZ!!!!!!!!
Jake: DISINTEGRATION IS THE BEST ALBUM EVER!!!!!
Jake: punk
Jake: Fine
Jake: Ignore me
Jake: See if I care....
Jake: No more band for you
Jake: So there
Jake: or there
Jake: or maybe even there
Jake: One time it was there--------->
Jake: I see how it is
Jake: It's just like this
Jake: only a little different
Jake: "....and when the horse's mane starts getting good in the back..."
Jake: Ace closes in 2 hours
Jake: Shall I begin the countdown?
Jake: 7200 seconds until Ace closes....
Jake: 7199
Jake: 7198
Jake: 7197
Jake: Actually, I may be wrong
Jake: But probably not
Jake: So how are you?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Good. And you?"
Jake: I'm fine
Jake: Wanna go to Ace?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Yeah, we should do that."
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Except, I'm a wanker"
Jake: Yes. Yes you are.
Jake: We should still go to Ace.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "But I can't. I have other things I have to do. Like pretend I can't hear Jake IMing me to ask me if I want to go to Ace."
Jake: That seems rather ironic
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Yes actually. But not in a 'pertaining to an iron' sort of way."
Jake: Right.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Either that, or I'm too busy sleeping. If I was going to be asleep, I would pick a time like when Ace is open to do that."
Jake: You would.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Yes, so I can complain about it a later time to those around me who would then probably continue to ignore me as usual."
Jake: Can't really blame them.
Jake: If you were you, you would probably ignore yourself too.
Jake: (That was a random Jake-ism)
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "True. However, I may just pretend that I was ignoring myself, and would probably still listen, because I have a bit of interest of things that I have to say. But I would never lead on to the fact that I was listening, because then it would not seem like I was ignoring and I wouldn't want to spoil my cover."
Jake: You have issues.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Yes I do. But don't forget that you're a subscriber, so you have no room to talk. Well, you have a room, and you can talk in that room, but that room is not here, so you have no room over here in which you can be talking. Or something."
Jake: You're a wanker
Jake: Hey....
Jake: Does this count as talking to myself?
Jake: Because I'm not talking, and I'm also pretending that someone else is responding.
Jake: SO does that still count as me?
Jake: I'm not sure.
Jake: I don't even know if I can figure that one out
Jake: It may just have to go to Useless Text and be done with it
Jake: So Shaun, you hungry?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "I'm always hungry. Except for when I'm not. But that is a rare case indeed."
Jake: Right. I just had Rocco's so I'm not particularly hungry. But I could eat.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Rocco's? Bastard. Some wankers I swear...."
Jake: You shouldn't swear. Ok, you should swear, but you shouldn't.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice)"....RIGHT...."
Jake: Exactly.
Jake: The opposite of left.
Jake: One's over here and the other's over there.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Not necessarily. One could be over there, and the other couldb over here."
Jake: True, but to me, over here for you is over there for me.
Jake: So it would then have to still be over here and over there. Unless it was over there and over there. If you know what I mean.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Nudge Nudge, wink wink, say no more, say _NO_ more!"
Jake: Right.
Jake: I just realized how strange this is
Jake: Someday we'll look at this and laugh.
Jake: IT will probably be today.
Jake: If you get yer ARSE to the computer already. BITCH!!!!
Jake: We'll have to get some outside opinions to see how accurate my portrayal of Shaun is. I think I'm pretty damn close myself. However, I am a wanker. And so are you.
Jake: I think that it's pretty close to conversation we'd make, except I seem to be typing nearly twice as much to participate. A bum deal if you ask me.
Jake: Next time, I don't want to type at all. Then it will be even.
Jake: So, remember the next time we IM, YOU'RE doing all the talking.
Jake: However
Jake: In order for there to be a next time, there has to be a this time. And as it stands, there is yet to be a this time.
Jake: You should do something to alleviate that "snag".
Jake: Maybe you should just respond.
Jake: That would do it I believe.
Jake: I bet if you just responded, this could actually be an IM session
Jake: The way it is now, it is really just an interrogation or something
Jake: Arguably a waste of bandwidth.
Jake: But I have bandwidth to spare.
Jake: And since it's already passed, it's ex-bandwidth.
Jake: It's too bad you can't save that somehow.
Jake: It would make a nice gift.
Jake: Especially if you could use it all at once.
Jake: If everyone saved all of their extra bandwidth since the inception of bandwidth, and it was cashed in to be used all at once, I'll bet you could download everything (for that particular moment in time). I mean everything.
Jake: That would be a bit of a problem though
Jake: Because you would need a download location
Jake: So maybe that would be a bad idea
Jake: But the idea of saving bandwidth is good.
Jake: It's kinda like carryover cell phone minutes
Jake: I wasn't using band, but I paid for it
Jake: So it's mine.
Jake: So........
Jake: Shauny-Shaun?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Yes?"
Jake: Where are you?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Here."
Jake: But where is here?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Right here."
Jake: But here is only where you make it. Sort of like home. Is "here" your home?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Well, I have 'made it' in my home. And if here AND home are where you make them, then, well maybe."
Jake: I see.
Jake: But not an Icee, because I don't want one right now. Maybe later. And I'll drink it here.
Jake: Wherever here is at that time.
Jake: So is here more of a situational time thing, not a place?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "You see, it depends. Because if you are referring to here as just an open space, then yes. Because it is not a tangible object in that instance. But if you refer to here in reference to an object, such as 'here at Jake's house is where I nearly crapped in my pants', then it is not a time thing. It all depends on how you look at it.
Jake: So, here is a perception thing then?
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Well, yes and no."
Jake: As long as you're sure.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Eh, exactly. Give or take."
Jake: I'll take take. It's harder to take give, because then you get into opposing forces and oxymorons.
Jake: (In mock Shaun voice) "Right. Wanker."
Jake: Yes. I am a right wanker, as are you.
Jake: I'd better stop
Jake: before I have a seizure
Jake: or before I blue screen my brain running too many mental applications at once.
Jake: So you're down to about 5600 some odd seconds boy
Jake: Punk.
Shaun just got home
Shaun shaun will be right with you
Jake: Punk
Jake: Oh ok
Jake: then sorry
Jake: No punk to you
Jake: just Shaun
Jake: And you must read from the top.
Jake: Both of you.
Shaun d00d
Shaun I had to save that one.
Shaun You have made me quite proud.
Shaun :-D
Jake: LOL
Jake: you could say i have issues
Shaun Unless you didn't, in which case you probably did anyway by not doing so, don't you think?
Shaun I could say that, but apparently I already did in my absence...
Jake: Amen brother
Jake: LMAO
Shaun ;)
Jake: So....
Jake: Ace?
Shaun Sorry - we went to benson, and then we had to get some shopping out of the way and it took rather longer than I expected :(
Shaun When do they close?
Jake: 6 I'm pretty sure
Shaun That doesn't really give us enough time :(
Shaun Not for proper meanderings and stuff.
Jake: If we go right now....and the way I drive
Jake: we'd get a few moments at least...
Shaun And....well....it IS the good Ace, which kinda requires proper meanderings and such :(
Jake: Your call
Shaun Well, get over here, and we'll either go or we won't, and we'll do something else if we don't - how's that sound?
Jake: That sounds .......like a PLAN
Jake: d00d!
Shaun d00d!
Jake: We have a plan!!!!
Jake: YAY!!!!!!
Shaun YAY!!!!!
Jake: OMG
Jake: way too wrong
Jake: YAY4PLANNING!!!!!
Shaun WOOHOO!!!
Jake: \\nn//
Shaun \\nn//
Jake: Ok, so I'm going to like head over (which is remarkably similar to heading over, just slightly different), and then we can continue with our current plan
Jake: Unless there are objections to that which is the "current plan"
Shaun Eh. Get over here. I'm going to club you like a harp seal and get you to agree to something dumb and geeky in a not-so-normal-for-us way ;)
Jake: Uh.....I think I have an objection to the current plan
Shaun Too late.
Shaun ;)
Jake: D'OH!!!
Shaun lol
Jake: Ok,I'm on my way....is there anything I should bring?
Jake: eMachine Carcass?
Shaun get yer arse and sundry other parts over here.
Shaun Don't sweat it - I grabbed the faceplate.
Jake: any other nipthy n3370 stuff?
Shaun Eh. Nothing comes to mind.
Jake: Typical. Wanker :-P
Jake: Ok, I'm on my way now
Shaun Right now?
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